Grandpa Riding

"Nearer My God, to Thee"

Music is my only way to deal. It's the only way I am able to handle things. What an amazing emotional relief it is to sing, hum, play or listen to something that has such profound meaning at a certain place and time. What a blessing.

I was fortunate enough to take time off school to be with Grandpa Riding at the hospital in Provo. I couldn't imagine being anywhere else. Just to be able to sit with him, talk to him, sing little things to him here and there. As pained as he was, he showed such elation for the things I shared with him. My grades, subjects in school I enjoyed, making student council and the things I would be in charge of. He was especially excited about me planning dances. He wanted me to teach the foxtrot. :) Sadly, I was never, nor am I now, any good at dancing. You can imagine, I was sorry to disappoint. :) I spent two days with him and STILL it was not enough. It would never be enough. My mom and I tried to see him as much as possible.

The last time I saw Grandpa Riding was June 3, 2002. He was in a hospice bed in Delta and my mom, Tam and I had gone down to be with him. Aunt Myrna and Uncle Jim were there as well, and I think Aunt Kris was there too. Well, as much time as I had spent with him, nothing was able to prepare me for the scene before me. Here was a man so strong. So full of integrity. So kind and generous. So tender. A man filled with such love and pride for his family, friends and country. In a body so weak. So frail. So fragile. And yet his strength was shining through. What an amazing man.

I held onto his hand that night, talking gently, humming softly, and when I sang a line or two of "More Holiness Give Me" I felt a light pressure on my hand. The smallest squeeze...to let me know he was aware. I felt urged to go on. I felt the need to prolong his calm, this peaceful feeling of love that filled his home. "Nearer My God, to Thee" sprung to my lips and I sang. Quietly and humbly I sang these words softly in his ear by his bedside:

Nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer to Thee!

E'en though it be a cross that raiseth me,

Still all my song shall be, Nearer, my God, to Thee;

Nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer to Thee!

Though like the wanderer, the sun gone down,

Darkness be over me, My rest a stone;

Yet in my dreams I'd be, Nearer, my God, to Thee;

Nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer to Thee!

There let the way appear, Steps unto Heav'n;

All that Thou sendest me in mercy giv'n;

Angels to beckon me, Nearer, my God, to Thee;

Nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer to Thee!

Then with my waking thoughts, Bright with Thy praise,

Out of my stony griefs, Bethel I'll raise;

So by my woes to be, Nearer, my God, to Thee;

Nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer to Thee!

Or if on joyful wing, Cleaving the sky,

Sun, moon, and stars forgot, Upward I fly;

Still all my song shall be, Nearer, my God, to Thee;

Nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer to Thee!

The Spirit, so strong, washed over me. Covering me in the most powerful feeling. I was overwhelmed with profound, divine love. It stayed with me. It stayed with him. I could feel the presence of it all night. This song, every meaning within it, was my way of grieving for my grandpa and what a beautiful feeling it is for me to know that my singing it was a comfort for him as well.

I share this story, not to get the tears flowing (although, let's be honest, I AM Lynette's daughter, and the tears are flowing freely), but to share with all of you, a moment that has been engraved in my memory and held so dear to my heart. How blessed I am to have been taught so much by a man I had never heard speak. Who taught me more by his example than words could have done justice. I miss him dearly. I only hope I can be as great an example as he was to me.

*Cassie Player*

Photographs and Memories...

Grandpa Riding

I have many memories of my sweet little grandpa. I remember him that way because he was always shorter than me for most of these memories except for a few vague earlier ones. There was a certain feeling in Grandma and Grandpa Riding's home that I can't quite describe although I'm certain you all know what I am referring to--a mixture of particular smells, sounds, and feelings that bring me back to them.

After Grandpa passed away someone brought out a huge bag full of his hat collection and I chose a few to take home--a tweed English style cap and an orange "I love beer" hat in particular. The English style cap smelled like Grandpa for at least five years afterwards and whenever I missed him too much I'd take out that hat and bury my nose in it, closing my eyes and pretending I was sitting in his living room with the muffled sound of a football game in the background. My oldest daughter Emelie has now taken over the hat because it's stylish again today. I was happy to pass it on to her so that she could have a part of Grandpa too.

The last time I visited Grandpa when he was still semi-healthy was just a few weeks after my third daughter, Erin, was born. A month or so afterwards he was taken to the hospital up in Provo. But at this visit he was walking around and Grandma Riding was on the couch with a hip injury. He was so adamant about making sure Erin had a quarter collection with her imprinted name on it like her two older sisters had. Despite the obvious effort it took him, he got the quarters out then and there and made her one before we left. Making sure all of his grandkids and great-grandkids were included in his interests was so important to him and I know it made all of us feel so special to him to be included in his $2.00 bill tradition, and then later his quarter collection.

I remember him asking me about my husband Rob, who hadn't come with me on this visit. He had always been excited that Rob had served in the Navy and had had long conversations with him on previous visits, through the help of his notepad, about Rob's Navy experiences. He was happy to have a grand-son-in-law who could appreciate his admiration for his son's Naval accomplishments. He was so proud of his son and never let a chance go by on our visits without whipping out Uncle Bob's Navy photos and sharing his admiration. He was a proud daddy that's for sure!

The last time I saw my Grandpa before he passed away was two days before at his home in Delta. I had driven down from Orem, where we were living at the time, with my sister Tinille, and my mom met us in Delta. I think either Aunt Lynette or Aunt Kris were there too, and of course Grandma, but I was too distraught inside to remember all the details except for one particular experience. A hospice nurse had come by to help Grandpa change his bedsheets. Grandpa was very obviously in deep pain. It was very hard to see Grandpa in so much pain and we were all gathered together in the corner of the livingroom in tears, some of us having to leave the room.

The nurse asked for some help moving him, and I stepped forward to help lift his head and shoulders. For some reason in those few moments I was able to put my grief aside and be a pillar of strength for Grandpa as he lied there in pain. I held his hand and leaned down near his face and said, "Grandpa, it's Amber, do you hear me?" He squeezed my hand in response. "I love you Grandpa, you can get through this, okay!" He squeezed my hand again, and we kept eye contact as I lifted up his shoulders. It might be seven years ago, but that moment will be frozen in time for me as I think on it, for it was a moment when I saw my Grandpa not just as my Grandpa and I as his granddaughter, but as another spirit who was in deep physical pain and our spirits connected as he leaned on my strength for a moment. He was my brother and I was helping him through this temporary pain, and a glimpse of our eternal spirits together overcame every fear I had as our hearts connected.

Grandpa is still there close in my memories, and will stay there as I reflect on his life, learning from the example he left for me. He was loved by many people in Delta. He was a great man, one I've tried to learn more of from hearing other's experiences with him. He was a handsome man and a cute "Italian-looking" gramps as he got older. He valued honesty and honor, integrity, and concern for others. He lived his life with zest, humor, and commitment. And he detested hypocrisy. When he felt strongly about something, he was adamant to have it happen. I remember one time Jan'l, Tinille, and I visited Delta and went out to dinner with Grandpa at that resturant with the big bull on top of it (Steakhouse something?). We were about to order typical chicken and he put his foot down: We were going to have steak! We came to a steakhouse and we weren't going to eat chicken! I've also heard stories of how committed he was to buying local and supporting Delta's community. He was an excellent example of how to be involved in and support our communities and neighborhoods.

I love my Grandpa Riding for all that he was and all that his life taught me.

--Amber Lynn Petersen McKenna

Grandpa & Grandma Moody

Some memories I have of Grandpa & Grandma Moody was when we would stay the night over at their house. It was TiNille, Amber and I and we would have tomato soup and Ritz crackers with Sunny Delight for lunch. We always loved playing outside with Dum Dum the german shephard, and playing on the haystacks. Sometimes we would drive into town, which was an adventure. I loved the smell of the house, Grandpa's pipe, and Grandma's lotion. I used to try and sneak some cookies from the cookie jar. She would catch me and slap my bum telling me to wait til after dinner. I also remember every night they would watch Wheel of Fortune and Jeapordy.
Grandpa would teach us songs as we sat on his lap. My favorites being "Turkey on Grandpa's farm" (I wish I remembered all the words now), "She'll be coming around the mountain" and his famous melody "Yankee Doodle", and other songs with it. To this day I have taught that song to my kids, and I always remember his train tooting.
I remember the Coca Cola ladies in her kitchen, (pictures on the wall) and the anchovies Grandpa would put on his pizza. (yuck!) I think I could describe every square inch of their house to someone if they wanted to know. :) The brown accordian type doors as we would go into our beds. I loved the comfort and love I felt there.
They were so wonderful and so much fun to be with. I miss them so much. I still picture them sitting in their house, it really isn't a reality that they are gone. I guess it makes it easier for me. There are so many other wonderful memories, Thanksgivings, and the walks, I loved being at their house. I love them so much, and will always cherish the memories.
After Grandma passed away, Mom and I went to go clean for Grandpa. I could feel her presence there so strongly. I was cleaning down by the TV room and kinda skimming past things. I will never forget the strong feeling of her telling me to clean the window sills, and stop being so lazy. :) She was a strong woman, with lots of love that she gave to all her grandchildren. I learned many things from her. I am so thankful for our grandparents, for their love.

His Hands...

When Grandpa was taken to the hospital for last time, I had received a phone call that he had been taken to the Hospital in Delta. I drove like a mad woman and just as I turned the corner in Lynndyl, I passed an Ambulance. I knew it was Grandpa. I called the hospital and they said that he was still there. So I kept driving. I was prompted to call again. I did, and this time was told that he had been taken by ambulance to UVRMC.

I turned the car around and drove to Provo. I was able to see him for a few minutes and spend some time with him. The next day after work I drove down to Provo again to spend time with him. After I spoke with him for a few minutes, I realized his skin was so dry on his hands, arms and face. So I looked around for lotion. Just then, one of Grandma Riding's sons came in. I told them I had to run an errand and I left them to have some time with him.

When I returned they were gone. I had purchased some decent lotion and I washed Grandpa's face and then hands and applied lotion to both. As I rubbed the lotion into his beautiful hands, the hands that had held me lovingly so many times, the hands that had taken mine and given me a slight squeeze over the years as he mouthed his words, I realized ... after all these years, that I have his hands. I have never liked my hands until that day. And now I love them, and I get to think daily of how much I love him.

Hailey - Hale - Hero

I don't know if any of you know this, but Hailey was named in honor of Grandpa Riding. She remembers him, which is amazing because she was very, very little when he passed away.

A couple of years ago, Mike, Hailey (5 years old at the time) and I were driving in the car and I told her about it. I told her that her daddy and I couldn't agree on a name to save our lives, and that finally, we decided to use family names so we could just agree on something. I chose her Great-Grandpa Riding because he was a wonderful man who I loved very much. His name was Robert Hale Riding. I told her that "Hale" means "Hero", and that even though he died when she was very young, he watches over her and I know that he helps her to make right decisions.

She was so amazed and so touched. She told me and Mike to plug our ears so we couldn't hear. I faked, of course, so I could hear what she was doing. ;)

She looked out her window, and in a soft, tender voice, she started talking to Grandpa. She whispered, "Dear greatest, greatest, grampa, I didn't know I was named after you. I know you can't talk, but I know you help me. I love you so much and you mean so much to me. Thank you, greatest, greatest grampa. You are a hero. I love you so much."

I felt Grandpa smiling down on us that moment.